Definitely do not meet up....
Nowadays, things are very different than the innocent "Hey, we're just stopping by"..... etc.
I had a friend that was asked to go to a "meeting" that she thought was one of 'upbuilding,' she cried, and the next thing you knew she was "marked".... She had no clue, until the announcement!
After that bit of insanity (elders with an ego can do and say anything they very well like) she thought, "Hell no, I won't go.... ever again!" I agree!
Never, and I mean never, meet with them... You have no control. They are a law to themselves. They do not deserve any information from you, so you SHOULD 'play along' / mislead with their "stupicratic warfare" / do anything to get them off your back. "I have a cold" "I am anxious, I couldn't sleep" "I changed my mind" or just plain old "don't go." Don't show up... People miss doctor's appointments that took them months to get, they miss job interviews, they miss dinner dates. What is so bad about "missing a meeting"?
If they do show up, and ask 'why?", just stare them in the face and don't answer them... Raise your eyebrows, shrug your shoulders, say, "Hmmm?" and walk away.
Don't go... your life will be more and more complicated, and why?